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LP Chapter 15

Page history last edited by Volkes_Wagon 10 years, 5 months ago

Caught This Mr. Archfair's Sheemah

 

     Kuchiha woke up to the sound of screaming.

     Rushing to Strawberry Inn's open window, she leaned halfway out and quickly evaluated the cause. A Sheemah had thrown its rider off in the middle of a busy intersection half a Mural [about 10 yards...? so a full Mural is 20] away from the Inn and was galloping towards it, apparently lost control of. The rider had crashed on top of another carriage, almost hard enough to splinter the tough wood. Covering her ears out of annoyance at the pointless (in her opinion) screaming, Kuchiha burst out of the inn door downstairs and into the panicking crowd. Not knowing the first thing about catching a Sheemah, she just charged at the bucking beast and grabbed it by the bite through luck [cuz apparently thats where you grab it], forcing it into submission. A breathless man with a monocle, the coachdriver of the crashed-upon carriage [how the heck do i say this], rushed over and helped her calm the animal down, yelling for an ambulence meanwhile.

     "Oh, thank you, my goodness, oh, what to do, oh what to do now!! Mr. Playfair, are you alright!! And Mr. and Mrs. Marksim!? Oh, the Festival!!"

     "Huh?" Kuchiha paused as she was returning to her room.

     "You must be a traveller; Mr. Playfair was the gentleman who crashed--he's the Archer of the Festival of Angels!! Oh, and not just any Archer--the Lead Archer, the Starter and Ender of the Festival of Angels!! Oh, the Festival! Oh, what to do with the Festival!!"

     Slightly puzzled, Kuchiha just left, since all she really cared about was getting rid of the noise, and she figured she would have entered the Path of Angels and Demons by the time the Festival started, anyways. After getting back to her room and sleeping for a few more minutes--the desert traps had proved more tiring than she expected--she readied herself for the day and met Kake in the mess hall, eating breakfast.

     "Aah--Kuch! Did you hear? Somebody crashed!"

     "I know."

     "Eehh, what's with the face? Apparently he broke his back, but he'll be okay. Caused a slight traffic jam on Strawberry Street [omg strawberry jam!!!], but everything should be cleaned up by now."

     "Wha--how'd'you know all that so fast?"

     "We're in Angel City here, remember? It's the feasting ground of both magic and science. Announcement birds come flying anywhere, anytime, and the doctors here know healing magic."

     "So they don't need a replacement for the Festival, huh."

     "Eh?"

     "So those announcement birds didn't say?" Kake shook his head. "Seems like this guy who snapped his spine was important for the Festival. Ending and Starting Archer or something. So there's such thing as healing magic...?"

     "Yes, of course there is. But an important performer in the Festival? How unfortunate. Healing magic is very advanced and taxing, and even Angel doctors can't fix a broken back in less than a day. If they didn't tell the public, they're probably going to try to get someone who can heal this Archer person or find a different Archer."

     "Hmm..."

     "How'd you know all this, Kuch?" The sulky look came back into her eyes.

     "Unlike you, I don't sleep like a log and ran outside when I heard the screaming. Caught this Mr. Archfair's Sheemah, and the coach driver told me all about it. And another thing. YOU'RE MAKING ME BANKRUPT!!!" Kake jumped, almost choking on the Lemine Drop [lemon/lime that tastes sweet. watch out for Lemines--they're not sweet. Drop=sugar.] halfway in his mouth. "Don't eat without my permission!!! You owe me--" she glanced at the pile of dishes beside him "--300 pintas!!"

     "I'm sorry! I'll pay you back, I promise! I'll give you something after breakfast, on my life!" 

     Kuchiha roared at him between bites of her own breakfast. Technically, no, it wasn't 300 pintas. The grand total was 274.

     After breakfast, they signed out of the inn and went to the market. "This," Kake said reassurantly, "will pay for breakfast."

     "Right. And I'm supposed to trust you!!? I'm shocked you didn't try to get away on our way here!!"

     "You can trust me on this, if nothing else." He plunged his hand into his sack and pulled out a plain-sheathed dagger. "300 pintas. Found it buried in the sand while you were rampaging at the desert traps."

     "Don't remind me. And you better not be lying." She unsheathed it. The light from an early firecracker set off in honor of the Festival glanced off of the dagger, making it glitter like a chrystalized rainbow. "Hu...d...DIAMOND!!!!??" She flinched at the sound of her voice and looked furtively around, but another firecracker had drowned out the word.

     "Now then, if you'll excuse me, I intend to sell some leather now. See you later!"

     And before Kuchiha could say anything else, Kake was gone from sight. Yet another slippery traveller.

     But Kuchiha was too busy trying to calm down to notice this. Her expert eyes could tell the dagger was real diamond, and even though she urgently told herself she wasn't greedy for material wealth, she wasn't at all tempted to find Kake again and exchange it for a more reasonable payment. Hurriedly, she sheathed the dagger, now watery-colored under the gray sky, and slipped it into her smaller, less conspicuous pouch [which happens to be strapped to her right thigh], patting it to make sure she wasn't halucinating. How the heck did a random diamond dagger wind up in the middle of a desert, anyways??

 

[should i just end the chapter here or attach the next one to it...?]

Table of Contents

Chapter 14

Chapter 16

Comments (15)

Volkes_Wagon said

at 5:44 pm on Mar 30, 2010

woah. i just counted about how many words i'd written in a month, and 50k words is HARD. from lp chapter 8-14 is only 7,500 words...

Mokona Go said

at 5:46 pm on Mar 30, 2010

Hey, unless you were planning on the dagger being able to control the weather, make it sunny.
wording. things are mving way too fast. its like superhuman paramedics instantly analyzing the guy and instant news travel (by mind!).
expand, so the reader isn't like, "whoa, did something just happen?" like i did.

Mokona Go said

at 5:46 pm on Mar 30, 2010

what's 50k?

Volkes_Wagon said

at 6:19 pm on Mar 30, 2010

50,000.
weelll...ah whatever. no but it has to rain soon. and then snow. or something. @ o @ basically there has to be clouds in the sky!!!
oh yeah. i was rushing for introducing jay...i really wanna meet him...

Mokona Go said

at 7:17 pm on Mar 30, 2010

still, i think a weather-controlling knife would be pretty cool.
that's called, "I JUST CAME UP WITH A STORY IDEA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Volkes_Wagon said

at 9:15 pm on Mar 30, 2010

um. *no*. its just cool cuz it's a diamond/invisible dagger. oh my. did i just give out a spoiler?
im moving jay's intro a chapter back yet again...since this is actually a really important arc...

Volkes_Wagon said

at 9:16 pm on Mar 30, 2010

I STEAL YOUR IDEA. A WEATHER-CONTROLLING KNIFE ISN'T BAD. ALTHOUGH THERE'S ALREADY A BAMBOO STAFF ONE. BUT WHO CARES.

Mokona Go said

at 9:52 pm on Mar 30, 2010

no you can't kuz that's copywiting.

Volkes_Wagon said

at 10:12 pm on Mar 30, 2010

hey! you need a...copywrite...thingy...for that! besides, i already stole a *ton* of stuff from other people. have you ever noticed the list!?

Mokona Go said

at 10:16 pm on Mar 30, 2010

THANK YOU, VW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MUCH better!
:)

Mokona Go said

at 10:28 pm on Mar 30, 2010

"Perfectly timed, the light from an early firecracker set off"
I think you could get rid of the "Perfectly timed" so it doesn't sound so, like, ummm, fated. and fake.

Volkes_Wagon said

at 5:28 pm on Mar 31, 2010

good idea.

Volkes_Wagon said

at 5:24 pm on Apr 2, 2010

@ o @ why must my brain make things so complicated. i won't be able to update for a while, i'll be in the east coast at college--but i swear there'll be a ton when i come back.

Volkes_Wagon said

at 10:31 pm on Apr 9, 2010

...dude nothing happened. except hazel went crazy. how many times d'you have to edit something before you get three paragraphs done!?

Volkes_Wagon said

at 11:10 pm on Apr 9, 2010

Numerous souces used in Kumon. Avatar. The Lord of the Rings: Movie Three: The Return of the King.

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